From The Records of the Watcher

Wanda:
To Dr. Banner: "Perhaps it is time that you and 'the other guy' talked. Who is he? Is he from another dimension?"

To Star Lord:
"He was injured. Probably severely. But he is a true super being, so... perhaps not..." Her eyes light up. "Perhaps it is a clerical error. Like that film that was on at 2 in the morning that we watched. 'Here Comes Mr. Jordenski.'" In which case, we should certainly try to find him."


"Was he killed by the sun?" Storm asks Star Lord. "Your father, I mean. Is he elsewhere in space?"

"He was duking it out with Thanos, that's the last I saw of him," says Star-Lord. "And then Dark Phoenix threw the Sun at us ... but he's gotta be alive, right? He'll pull through!"

The Invisible Girl says:

"These infinity stones are very dangerous! What shall we do with them? Not even the Illuminati could be trusted with such power! Perhaps we should give the gems to an irresponsible yet lascivious troll, an artificial man tormented by self-doubt destined to become ultimately evil, a female space-assassin, a notorious but literal minded space-criminal bent on revenge, an arrogant bald telepath woman, and give one back to Thanos.

"If this seems like an utterly absurd and ridiculous group of people to whom to entrust the nigh-infinite power of the gems, maybe we should just keep them. We can call ourselves SPIDERMAN AND HIS AMAZING INFINITY WATCH.

"Either that, or THE AMAZING EIGHT. Groups where you just pick a flattering adjective and your number are the best kind. Did I count right? An adventuress, a witch, a mutant, a robot, two insect men, a space rogue in rocket boots, and were-astronaut?

"We may need to split two gems into four, or find other infinities to loot. We don't have enough for everyone right now. I can ask The Watcher where they are! He says he never interferes, but he is a big sweetheart, and helps out a lot. For example, does Eternity have any brothers or sisters? Maybe they have gems."

Spidey Says to the Invisible Girl (he used to be able to think it, but he gave up his infinite power for his mindbogglingly short life to continue for an infinitesimal fraction of a cosmic second. It was probably worth it, though, because if he was dead, who would take care of aunt May?! Who would deliver the pictures he took to J. Jonah Jameson?!! And who would explain to M.J. that he missed their date on the most flimsiest of pretenses DEATH?!?!?! No he can't die so he will continue to express everything he means, OUT LOUD!!!(He thinks this forgetting the mindlink.))

 "Sue, I think you will need to greatly improve the name of the team before it will be usable. THE AMAZING EIGHT is a terrible team name, THERE IS NO ALLITERATION!!! Something like THE EXCELLENT EIGHT would be a much better name, don't you think?"

The Vision and Machine Man look at each other. Machine Man says,

"Ah, I think you mean TWO robots?"

Ant Man says:
"I see no one has any ideas on how to save the dead people. Hay, Vig, maybe you can ask Eternity how to do it... or we could just invade The Land of the Dead to get them back. That might work as well. Ow and Invisible Girl, what makes you think that that Team you suggested is a good group of people to hand Eternity to?... And how did you come up with that concept at all?"

The Vision says:

"In your history, do groups make better decisions than individuals? If so, let us divide the Stones among those we know well."

"It might be best to entrust the Infinity Gems to someone who can make mistakes, but cannot go mad with rage or greed. I have the perfect candidate."

"Zo, you are villing?" Wanda smiles at him.

"Oh. I did not mean myself," says the Vision, although he doesn't blush, already being very red indeed. "I meant Machine Man."

Wanda: "I am sure Machine Man vill do a fine job...but he is not immune to anger. Unless..."
She turns to Machine Man.
"You have devised a protocol?"

Machine Man says, "Sure! I identified anger and deleted it. It's running in background now, I don't even notice it. But, uh, I don't have a good model of other emotions. Do the Gems produce other things, like anti-rage? Whatever that is."

A shimmer distorts the sky and the ground, as though the solid earth were but a reflection glimmering on a deeper ocean Man never perceives.

Through the shimmer, golden stars blaze in a deep blue sky. And through it steps a giant bald mad, clad in toga and boots, with a blue kirtle belted around his waist, a complexly ornamented gorget extending past his shoulders, and a big electronic book, also in blue.

He looks down at everyone and intones,

"I ...am the WATCHER!"

The Watcher does not notice Sue, facing the others, mouthing along with the words, because he always says the same thing.

"The Infinity Stones are too powerful for mortals to trifle with, as Sue Storm has wisely spoken," intones the Watcher. "Many are the alternative worlds in which a single one of the Stones has wiped all life from the Macrocosmic All. I warn you, despite my oath of non-interference, to place them out of your grasp, lest you be taken by passing whim to do what cannot be undone!"

"Furthermore, I"

And then the Watcher stops talking, and kinda stands there.

The Vision snaps his head up abruptly.

"I beg your pardon," he says, sincerely. "I was thinking he was taking a long time to say what we already agree with. I fear I wished him to stop droning on ..."

"And it happened!" says Star-Lord excitedly. "Wow, these Stones ARE powerful! We gotta use them real hard, right now, to fix all the damage! Lemme try the Love-Stone ..."